One thing I learned in one of marriage and family therapy classes was "People stay in a relationship because they're getting something out of it." I've found this statement to be very true. Have you wondered why one of your friends hasn't left that loser or crazy person yet? Well it's because they're getting something they value in return and it's enough to stay. I've kept very bad friendships and relationships because the things I was getting out of them was good enough for me at that time...needless to say I'm no longer in those situations.
Are you in a bad relationship? Think about friendships, family members, and colleagues when you answer this question. Now, despite the drama, what are you getting out of the relationship? Think long and hard about this question...you may have to dig deep. The answer may make you feel crappy. Remember, people remain in relationships because they're getting something out of it. The next question is, can the thing that is keeping you in the drama be found somewhere else? This is where you have to be honest with yourself. If the answer is yes, what do you need to do to end the relationship and find the thing keeping you around somewhere else? Again, think long and hard about this. Write it down if you need to. Then, take action!
Have you just gotten out of a crappy relationship or friendship? It feels crappy and good at the same time doesn't it? Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, moving on is a difficult process. I mean this person was a very important to you and there were in your life for however long, you don't forget that overnight. You're going to miss that person and doubt yourself but as time passes you'll see that things do get better, little by little, some days in tiny baby steps. You have to stay strong and stick to your guns in keeping this person out of your life. Remember in my earlier post just because you forgive someone's wrongdoings does not mean they remain a part on your life. Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist if it seems too difficult to stay out of that bad relationship.
Remember that no relationship should have drama or make you feel bad about yourself in any way.
Take care,
-Kimmy
Are you in a bad relationship? Think about friendships, family members, and colleagues when you answer this question. Now, despite the drama, what are you getting out of the relationship? Think long and hard about this question...you may have to dig deep. The answer may make you feel crappy. Remember, people remain in relationships because they're getting something out of it. The next question is, can the thing that is keeping you in the drama be found somewhere else? This is where you have to be honest with yourself. If the answer is yes, what do you need to do to end the relationship and find the thing keeping you around somewhere else? Again, think long and hard about this. Write it down if you need to. Then, take action!
Have you just gotten out of a crappy relationship or friendship? It feels crappy and good at the same time doesn't it? Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, moving on is a difficult process. I mean this person was a very important to you and there were in your life for however long, you don't forget that overnight. You're going to miss that person and doubt yourself but as time passes you'll see that things do get better, little by little, some days in tiny baby steps. You have to stay strong and stick to your guns in keeping this person out of your life. Remember in my earlier post just because you forgive someone's wrongdoings does not mean they remain a part on your life. Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist if it seems too difficult to stay out of that bad relationship.
Remember that no relationship should have drama or make you feel bad about yourself in any way.
Take care,
-Kimmy
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