PhD Program Application...going big!

Hey guys!

I just started my application for my PhD program...I decided to get it online at Capella University mainly because I plan on private practice both in person and online and to do both I need to get my LMHC, which I'm eligible for already.  The PhD is a personal goal of mine and I'm almost there already and I have nothing better to do right now anyway.  I'm going to pay the application fees when I get paid later this week.  My Capella application is my birthday present to myself. 

To update you on my progress on starting my LMHC, apparently I'm (inadvertently) in the middle of some office politics at my 9-5...messed up I know but I'm not too concerned about it because I'm applying for my PhD program!  I've devised a plan B to get clinical supervision with the help of my Linkedin account so I hope to start that process soon although I'm going to pay out of pocket for supervision now.

I'm going to need your support more than ever!  Please check out the ads on my blog and Twitter (despite the annoyingness) so I can get paid and use the money to pay for my LMHC supervision.  Once I get licensed, I can officially and legally do therapy online...I'm talking individual and group therapy services online.  It's gonna be awesome!

I plan on adding to my mental health 101 series now that I know where my DSM-IV and other references are in my house...February was one of the best months I've had in a very long time thanks in part to you guys! I have 75 views on this blog, which is pretty awesome!  If I can get to 100 views by my birthday in a couple of weeks, I'm going to tell my friends and family about what I've been up to for the past couple of months...I'm a sneaky little thing am I?

Again thanks for checking out the blog and keep an eye out for big things coming!

Take care,
-Kimmy :)

Sacrifices

In the spirit of Mardi Gras and Lent, let's talk about sacrifices some. Catholics observe Lent to show their devotion to God however people sacrifice desires to improve their life everday. Parents sacrifice their personal desires for their children everyday. Military of all nations sacrifice their time, health, and ultimately their lives to keep their homelands safe from harm. People sacrifice everyday whether they want to or not because they have the big picture in mind.
Do you have a goal or change you want but requires you to give up some things to achieve it? Remember the big picture and your sacrifices are temporary in most cases. Talk to family and friends about what you want to do and get their support. The most important thing to remember is that when all is said and done, the sacrifices are so very worth it!

Slacking...

I haven't been on the ball lately...I realize that entrepreneurship thing is a 25/8 deal...I've been busy with the 9-5 and some family stuff. I'm taking a very much needed mental health vacation then I'll be posting regularly again. Again I apologize for slacking and I'll be back in action soon...but you know what, I do have a post in mind...

Fighting Over a Man/Woman

Getting into it with another person over a man/woman is the dumbest thing ever because it's pointless to fight for someone who was never yours or who does not want to be yours because if they did, there wouldn't be another person in the picture in the first place...PERIOD! If someone wants to fully commit to you they will not consider anyone else so if there are other people, your potential partner doesn't want to commit to you. Talk is cheap, actions speak volumes! If that person doesnt see you as the person for them you need to let them go...don't bring yourself down to the drama of fighting over anyone! Work on being a better person and bide your time until the person you don't have to fight for comes along.

That is all...

Take care,
-Kimmy

Cheaters...

Why do people cheat? Well, for many reasons...most of the time it's because one partner is not getting what they want/need in the relationship due to of lack of communication. There are some people who are just bad seeds. Despite the why, being cheated on sucks. It sucks because the trust is broken and with STDs running rampid and becoming more difficult to treat, it's also a health issue.

If you been cheated on, the first thing you need to do is get checked out for STDs. Use condoms everytime you have sex until you get the all clear from the doctor. After you take care of the medical, you have to decide whether you want to forgive your cheating partner. If you decide to end the relationship, that's okay. If you decide to continue to remain in the relationship, that's perfectly fine too as long as you and your partner commit to communicating and working on what's wrong in the relationship. Go to couple's therapy if you need help with that. In addition as much as you want to, don't ask for details of the affair or the other person. That has nothing to do with your relationship and details do more harm than good. Although you have been wronged, you have to work on forgiving your cheating partner for YOU! Holding in resentment or taking in out on people who don't deserve it does much more harm than good and life is too short to have such negative feelings boiling within.

If you're the cheater, after you've been tested for STDs and ended all communication with the other person (phone, text, Facebook, and Twitter), you need to decide if you want to be in the main relationship in the first place. You need to think long and hard about this because it is not good to drag someone along in something you're not going to put 100% in. If you want to end the relationship, that's fine. If you want to continue the relationship, you need to tell your partner what you were not getting in the relationship or what caused them to stray and what you need to tell them what they need to do to satisfy that. If the other partner is unable or unwilling to give you what you need, the relationship needs to be ended. You may also need to so some soulsearching if what you want or need cannot be fulfilled by another person (i.e
Mom/Dad issues). A therapist can help you wifh personal issues if need be. Don't expect forgiveness and trust within a short period of time. You may never be forgiven or trusted again and you must accept that because it's the other person's right to give you that privlege and you MUST EARN IT BACK!

If you're thinking about cheating, you need to do one of two things, tell your partner what you are unhappy about and give them the opportunity to fix it or end the relationship (for good) and find what you're looking for. You cannot have your cake and eat it too.

I hope this post helps people in this situation...

Take care,
-Kimmy

Love is in the air: Why stay in a bad relationship?

One thing I learned in one of marriage and family therapy classes was "People stay in a relationship because they're getting something out of it."  I've found this statement to be very true.  Have you wondered why one of your friends hasn't left that loser or crazy person yet?  Well it's because they're getting something they value in return and it's enough to stay.  I've kept very bad friendships and relationships because the things I was getting out of them was good enough for me at that time...needless to say I'm no longer in those situations.

Are you in a bad relationship?  Think about friendships, family members, and colleagues when you answer this question.  Now, despite the drama, what are you getting out of the relationship?  Think long and hard about this question...you may have to dig deep.  The answer may make you feel crappy.  Remember, people remain in relationships because they're getting something out of it.  The next question is, can the thing that is keeping you in the drama be found somewhere else?  This is where you have to be honest with yourself.  If the answer is yes, what do you need to do to end the relationship and find the thing keeping you around somewhere else?  Again, think long and hard about this.  Write it down if you need to.  Then, take action!

Have you just gotten out of a crappy relationship or friendship?  It feels crappy and good at the same time doesn't it?  Don't let anyone tell you otherwise, moving on is a difficult process.  I mean this person was a very important to you and there were in your life for however long, you don't forget that overnight.  You're going to miss that person and doubt yourself but as time passes you'll see that things do get better, little by little, some days in tiny baby steps.  You have to stay strong and stick to your guns in keeping this person out of your life.  Remember in my earlier post just because you forgive someone's wrongdoings does not mean they remain a part on your life. Reach out to friends, family, or a therapist if it seems too difficult to stay out of that bad relationship.

Remember that no relationship should have drama or make you feel bad about yourself in any way. 

Take care,
-Kimmy

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I'm trying to add myself to the Technorati directory and I believe they're looking for this code:   Y7HADYV8P2PG